For the past several months, I have kept Everything Elsa readers up to date on the mental meanderings and physical predicaments of my time with osteoarthritis. Some of those thoughts addressed the need to let others in and help; some discussed the art of discerning when to give in and conversely, when to rally with all your might. In sum, I found myself writing pieces that fell into the category of “share my experiences with others with the intent to help.” I have been pleased with the result, both for myself and others.
This morning, however, reminded me that when it comes right down to it, your best resource is yourself. As crass and somewhat cold as it may sound, the common refrain of, “You live alone, and then you die alone” at first reading seems true. Certainly, one enters the world in the solo vessel of the body; then, that structure makes its passing as a discrete material form.
But the above adage refers to body, only: Mind, heart, and soul eternally are connected energetically to the Divine, the Universe, and—during their stint on Earth—the energies of others. Pre (or re)—birth, birth, Life, Death: Throughout this cycle that, arguably, will recur time and again, the physical body exists of its own accord—sometimes accompanied by others, and quite often, as a lone wolf. Yet even during the solo ventures, one’s personal energies remain in resonance with those of others.
I find myself wandering into this territory after speaking earlier today with a woman I had never met. She had left a message, citing a referral from another stranger, who had heard I was a dog and house sitter. When I returned her call this morning, I expected a short exchange (as I would be unavailable to help at this time): However, she talked, I listened, and both of us were a bit stunned that our call lasted 25 minutes.
In that time, I learned that “Pat” has two dogs, her oldest (16) of whom was on his last legs with cancer. She confided that while she wondered if she should end “Deacon’s” life, she felt that the time had not yet come. She underscored their bond and mutual need for each other by citing her husband’s passing just months ago, in January. She added that her sister had died seven months ago, in November.
No wonder she was having a hard time letting go of Deacon.
To further her overwhelming feelings, Pat had never lived alone. She spoke of not eating well, due to her dislike of dining alone: Each night, she would sit for supper, and “give up” after a few bites. She mentioned her aloneness several times throughout our conversation. Because my heart had swung wide open by this point, I felt comfortable enough to comment that I would be sending prayers: “If that would be meaningful to you…” is about how I put it. She responded quickly with a clear, “Oh, yes, it is.” Thus, I knew that she had some connection to that which reverberates around us.
And yet, Pat felt at sea with the idea of being alone. Her aloneness stems from not having a physical human presence share her daily routines and abode; however, she never once used the word lonely. Because I now know that Pat has some sort of spiritual leaning; that she has a supportive family, albeit not locally; and that she feels the powerful energetic impact of the loss of her husband’s physical presence, I believe that she is not at all alone.
To love, to miss, to feel adrift: These states themselves refute that one is alone. When one becomes aware that earthly existence is anchored in and potentially unmoored by the energetic shifts wrought by emotion, circumstance, and relationship, one then recognizes the “never-aloneness” of Life.
And now, the title of this rumination: Why You Need You. If granted the idea that energy resonates between each of us and with the Universe at all times, throughout eternity, then the greatest relationship to hone is that with yourself. By taking the time to pray, meditate, and contemplate the notion that “God and Me are One” (a kundalini mantra), our energy fields expand, brighten, and vibrate more strongly.
When one’s physicality becomes hindered, it need not signal a lessening. Times of illness, injury, or even a lifetime of physical challenge can lead one to a greater reliance: not on the physical help of others, but on the ever-present treasure that is your subtle energy body. “Live alone and die alone?” Not when you have You.